Cursed Lightening Storm!

So I am finally able to post again. Our internet has been down for a while thanks to this wonderful lightening storm a week and a half ago. it actually struck in our courtyard frying several things in the complex. We were lucky and only lost our modem. Our neighbors lost several things, most notably their TV. That sucks.
When we did get the modem replaced I couldn't get the router up and running. Which meant I had no wireless so C and I were forced to share the desktop. That was lame. More so for him than me. Since I am back temping I can check my email all day long. His company has asshole IT people who have blocked all non-company email services. nice.
I understand why, I still think it is obnoxious.
So we saw Eagles of Death Metal and they were wonderful. Josh was not part of the tour alas. They had some young bleached blonde guy with a really bad haircut playing drums instead. And the bass player was all old and fat and strungout looking. WTF? But they did kick ass and put on a great show. We hung out to catch a bit of Peaches who ended up being horrible. It was like a Museum School show gone terribly wrong. I know you're thinking "is that even possible as they are all so bad to begin with?" Yes it is not only possible I witnessed it in action. She seemed very adamant to writeand perform only songs about her pussy. I guess that is her thang but it came across as puerile and annoying. Maybe its a generational thing. Having experienced punk and people like Wendy O Williams (rest her soul) as well as performance artists like Bob Flanagan I might have been more jaded than those at Avalon. Sure someone needs to sing songs about the power of pussies. But you know, do it better. A metaphor goes a long way. being so blunt is just plain lazy. Christ! Plus it was techno music so fuck that. I have a hard time believing that she opened for the Bauhaus/NIN tour. I would have asked for some of my money back or better yet arrived late.

So back temping at Putnam. They have nothing for me to do so I bring my laptop and stuggle to finish this fuckin thesis. I am so over it.
I volunteered at this games conference yesterday. I felt foolish doing it as I have so much work to do. But a day away from the thesis was probably good for me.
Everyone drooled over the fact that I work with Henry Jenkins. Now I like Henry. I love his work and I got to take his comic book class which was awesome!
That said, Henry was the guy I always had to go and complain to because he is department head. So our relationship was probably not one of fan-boy to fan-object.
Plus he always had absolutely no interest in my research topic. he was never mean or dismissive. It was simply an area of expertise that he didn't care to pursue.
So I simply nodded my head and said "yes, I am in Henry's department and yes it is awesome"
yaddda yadda yadda.
I was assigned to monitor the games room. it was first thing in the morning and no one had arrived yet so I spent two hours playingKatamari. This game is awesome. It is also extremely irritating and adictive. If you haven't experienced it go out now and buy it. It has been out for a while and should be cheap. It is so worth it! Plus the sound track of crazy Japanese pop music makes it even better!

back to writing.

names...

I want you so hard!

Once again our glorious MBTA irritates the shit out of me. I made a quick run to Harvard to take a look at some books I had requested from the archives. I am there maybe an hour then jump on the T home. Two stops. that is all I have to travel. Between Harvard and Central the train comes to a stop. I sit there reading listening to music. Nothing happens. 10 minutes pass. I take off my ipod in case they make an announcement, usually it consists of traffic ahead yadda yadda yadda. Nothing. Another 10 minutes go by. At this point I have finished the weekly rag I was reading and start getting annoyed. They finally announce that there is something wrong with the train. They are trying to get it moving, clearly unsuccessfully. Another 10 minutes goes by and we begin limping towards Central Square. They boot us all of the train into the crowd that has now gathered at Central waiting for us! I then proceed to sit at Central for another 10 minutes waiting for a new train. I look at my watch and realise that I could have walked home in the amount of time it took me to travel one stop.
Over an hour! that is how long it took me to get from Harvard to my house. Two train stops. The red line has gotten seriously ghetto lately. I used to think that the Orange line was bad but damn! Well, the orange line is still the worst. I had to take it to my job interview the other day but our beloved red line is catching up in the race to be the shittiest mass transit line in the city! Go red!!
Today I shlep once again to Harvard and I am there an back in an hour. WTF!
I think I am losing patience with this city.
I am off to see the Eagles of Death Metal tonight!! I am very exciting but bummed because I have no money so it will be a sober night out! I have to say that Josh Homme from Eagles and QOTSA is HOT! Alas he will be behind the drumkit tonight so no easy viewing. One annoyting this is that it is at Avalon. I fuckin hate that club. Overpriced drinks, snotty ass people.

names...

Please, please, please, don't come to Boston, part 2.

This is why I don't have a car in Boston. You are just asking for trouble.
"Truck flips on Mass. Pike near Fenway Park"

What the fuck else can happen? Oops, I probably shouldn't have said that.

Responding to my own misanthropic post.

So I just read what I wrote after posting it and realised that perhaps I came across as a bit too...fucked up. I considered deleting it but then realised that, for whatever reason, I needed to write it. So fuck it, it's out there. But I also feel I must respond to it. As I feel perhaps a recognition of my own desire to wallow in a construction that is my own making. That is, my existence. In moments like these I find myself turning to the well known misanthrope Arthur Schopenhauer. This quote perhaps says a bit about my situation:

"Each person has a character of his own; hence the same motive has not the same influence on everyone, and a thousand small details which occupy the ample scope of one man's ken, while they are unknown to other people, modify its effect. For this reason a deed cannot be predicted on the basis of the motive alone, for the other factor is wanting: the close knowledge of the individual character, and of the discernment which goes with it."

The World as Will and Idea, p. 51.

I can understand a motive to do something but I can never understand what would drive someone to act on that motive. It actually isn't as dark a statement as one would presume to find with Schopenhauer. I'm not sure if I find it helpful but perhaps...

names...

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar, and sometimes it is something else...

It has been a while since I last posted. I think I got tired of complaining and writing, or complaining about writing. I still have nothing new.
As my deadline looms my insomnia returns. I finally dozed off around 3 and was awake at 7. I'm trying to think of that as a good thing. I got to stay up and watch part of Star Wars III, yay! But somehow I'd rather have a good nights sleep.
I am avoiding thinking about what happens after I finish my thesis. Although to be honest I hope that the first thing is at least eight hours of sleep. But I'm afraid it is bigger things than that. It is a whole lot of "what do I do with my life" existential crap that I am not very good at navigating. I'm thinking of returning to therapy. Well, if I get a job that has health benefits including it. I don't think it is in my budget to fork over money just to talk to someone for an hour a week.
I should be looking to C for an ear but sometimes my problems lie with him and sometimes with my relationship issues. Not to delve too far but trust will always be an issue with me. After 8 years of living with a drug addicted, lying, cheating muther fucker trust is extremely hard for me to come by. Even after three and a half years together I question and wonder. Certainly C is worlds away from S, intellectually, spiritually, all those things. But the problem is me and my purview.
Deep down I still believe that all people (with very few exceptions) are bastards who will stab you in the back if given half a chance.

Quote of the day:
"The flood of precise information and brand-new amusements make people smarter and more stupid at once."
Max Horkheimer & Theodor Adorno

Please, please, please, don't come to Boston!

Holiday weekends are the worst in Boston. Make it a beautiful day and it all goes straight to hell. This week was torturous. I wanted to run screaming back across the river to nice quiet Cambridge. The city is mobbed with tourists. Clueless meandering meatbags setting out to make my life a living hell. Also school is clearly out so every teenager within commuter rail distance of the city makes their way to Downtown Crossing and the waterfront. Two areas I must traverse on my way to and from work. The photo above is the building where I work it sits in the heart of the financial district which is, of course, right on the water two blocks from the aquarium. My commute and lunch breaks are exercises in body-checking slack-jawed yokels.

Good Times!

We went to the B-Side last night and I had the opportunity to chat with this filmmaker David. His work has been screened on PBS and other places. He used to be an editor for Carpenter back in the early 80s. He made this amazing series that screened on PBS this past spring called "Country Boys." We have been calling him Count Dracul because he has salt and pepper hair that sweeps back and he has a large moustache. He turned out to be a really nice guy. A little kooky, but very interesting. I tend to think that all filmmakers are a little kooky. I think it is in the genetic makeup of those who want to make films.

I am now spending a beautful day in the library. Once again working on my paper.
I am seriously ready to be over this shit. I realised I forgot my power cord upon emptying out my bag so I won't be here as long as I had planned. That is probably a good thing.

We will be spending the fourth on our friend William's roof deck on Beacon Hill. Watching the fireworks and drinking heavily. All within walking distance of home.
Yay!

names...